Sunday, August 17, 2008
Kid's Honesty
Aubrey got one of those cute kid journals from a friend of hers. And it's got cute little questions on it. If you went on vacation what would you take with you, if you could go anywhere where would it be. That sort of thing. Well I'm looking through her answers and I come across this one. "If you found a million dollars what would you do?" Aubrey's response "take it". I love kids! They are too funny!
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Insights to Jared's soul
Let me preface this by saying the Palmer family has a group email list. We circulate family events, funny pictures and the ever so enjoyable tell me 40 things I already knew about you email. Well for some reason this one really stuck. EVERYONE answered it and as the day wore on it became a "I can out do you" type game. So at 1:30 am this is what my husband wrote. As a sidebar I don't know if I find it disturbing or hilarious. You be the judge.
OK, it's now 12:30, I just got home from working tirelessly at keeping everyone at work happy and satisfied with their work environment. It's a tough job, but with my amazing talents I seem to get the job done somehow! Matt, I know you and I both work extremely hard (your the second hardest worker I know), but comonow....even I can find time to respond to email. Maybe if you had a job in some type of technology industry that required you to use computers....oh wait a minute....heh heh! Love ya brutha.....now on to the serious matter at hand:
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
Yes, I believe Eric, Aaron, Janene, and Kari were named first. I was named after them. I guess I was also named after Adam and Eve; I think my femininity (total word because spell check says so) comes from her. I get my humility from Ghandi I think (in case your wondering, I was also named after him).
Seriously: (apparently this is a theme): Grandpa Palmer, Freeman Moses Palmer- My good looks totally came from him! Have you seen pictures of his vivacious smile and stunning hair! My genes RULE!!
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
I cry all the time (I think I got that from Eve too; either her or Glenn Beck...he's a total cry baby as well, probably because he knows Barack Obama will be our next President....YES WE CAN!) Seriously: Probably after hearing the story of the 9 yr old Chinese boy that walked with Yao Ming in the Olympic Opening Ceremonies! I love to hear stories of courage and faith and goodwill, especially in a commi country like China. It gives me hope for the future of our country when we're stuck with Chairman Obama (YES WE CAN!!)
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Love it! My preference is Courier or San Serif. When I'm feeling really bold I like to use Bank Gothic. Seriously: "I love technology...." I like being able to read legibly, so please people; type more, write less! Most people don't want to admit it, but 9/10 peoples handwriting sucks rocks (this is a fact that I got straight from The Daily Show!). alnveoihapuhe asoiefahe aoinwvoi aoihhgpijrg9ojahwfouhwef..... See? Not being able to understand what someone wrote really stinks, so let's get typing people (everyone except Matt of course...we all know he doesn't know how to use a keyboard; which is why he has a wife. Way to go Kari! Matt, if you actually do read this, snicker snicker, chortle chortle, it's OK, we can't all be perfect, and I know it's probably because your still at work fixing computers. Maybe tomorrow you'll get around to learning to actually USE them :0 )
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE LUNCH MEAT?
I'm gonna go with the kind that comes from animals. Add a bit of honey or dry rub, and it's even better! To put it plainly... if it used to moo, oink, cluck, plead to stay on the farm just another day, I'm gonna love "gettin it in ma bellee"! And, for the record, that nasty stuff that Grandma Solie would "spread" in between bread, is NOT meat! That's like saying that just because Matt works on Computers, he knows how to respond to email or type! Total fallacy!
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
Three of the cutest little rays of sunshine on planet earth! Hey, I got no problem admitting it! My kids are cuter than your kids and I'll fight anyone who says otherwise (remember that I was also named after Genghis Khan and Hillary Clinton so I can have a bitter mean streak at times!) Seriously: Aubrey is Miss America, Natalie is that cute powder puff girl that is all girl, but has no problem kicking your ass if the case warrants it. And Addison is one big smiling, calm, peaceful, bowl of sunshine with happiness sprinkles with a dollop of adorable on top. Hold on a sec....I need a bowl of Ice Cream....
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Of course! I have a split personality. If I'm kind to me then I would totally hang out with myself. Or if I end up being a total nimrod (for some reason Mike Huckabee comes to mind..thanks Huck for siphoning off enough votes from Mitt Romney to make sure that we get saddles with John "Mavrick on the outside, gooey socialist who likes taxes and hugging trees on the inside" McCain) then I think I would just take the high road with myself, count my blessings that I'm not as bitter as the former me, and do my Latter Day Saint Duty by "fellowshipping" the horrible nimroddiness (I don't think that's a word because spell check put a bunch of red dots underneath it) out of myself. Wait....who's on Second Base
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?
Ya know....after thinking long and hard about it...I don't think so! What a silly question! For me, that's like saying, "is it really difficult for you to keep your washboard abs looking as great as your biceps?" Of course not! It all comes naturally and without forethought. (when will the sarcasm end?)
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
I don't know...Like Eric I have never seen them, and I truly believe it's a made up bodily appendage. It's totally the doctors excuse to explain away any and all problems you may have in your head. The same is true with the appendix and the fifth metatarsal (Randy is the spelling correct on that one?)
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
Only if the bungee cord was actually a 1" thick steel cable, and the "jump portion" was a HUGE crane that slowly lowered me down in a large metal box. Kinda like those large people movers that you see in large buildings that have more than one floor. I think they are called elevators. I LOVE Elevators, especially the ones with the glass walls that let you see all the action around you are you speed up and down the elongated shaft that keeps the elevator upright. What can I say...I'm a sucker for thrill rides!!!
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
I would have to say the kind that come in a box. I can eat the ones that come in a bag, but they don't have the same corn syrup/sugar mix that I have grown accustomed to... And cereal gives me a chance to catch up on all the adolescent years of being separated from my long lost soul mate...Milk. Oh sweet nectar of the bovine Teet! I shall never leave thee again! Cows rule! Milk in the mornin, roast beef in the afternoon, and steak in the evening (but only during times of winter or famine...of course).
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OF ?
No, I myself, like my good friend and bother in law Matt, I have my wife do the things I'm just too busy to do myself. Thanks Matt, you are a true Patriot of the Patriarchal order! And when my wife isn't around I like to teach my wonderful daughters what being a truly devoted daughter is all about, by having them take my shoes off after a hard day of bacon getting. So as to the initial question I'll have to consult with my wife and daughters to see if they untie my shoes before taking them off. I'm usually just too exhausted at the end of a long work day to notice how they release me from my pedestrian chains. Seriously, I will be beaten and flogged for making such a comment in public. Please refer to the definition of Natalie in question 5; my ass has just been handed to her for the kicking....
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?
This is such a derogatory and demeaning question. I would like to consider myself somewhat of a champion of the people. This would include people of all strengthnicities (again, there go those darn red dots under my letters! grrr); some that might engender similarities to myself like magnanimous brute power, as well as those who might not have the commanding presence that I tend to radiate. I would like to think that I can relate to all people of all sizes and strengths (I'm trying to gain the Vice Presidential nomination with Barack Obama, how am I doin?) Oh yeah....Change and Hope make us all Strong...
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
I yeah...I forgot about Ice Cream! MAN DO I LOVE COWS!!!! I would have to say my favorite kind is that one that.....ummm...oh the name escapes me....oh yeah, it's the one that has cream, suger, and milk in it....I like that one, but not chocolate. I like vanilla more than chocolate. Not that there is a problem with chocolate (just in case the Obama camp happens to get this email, I don't want them to label me as a hate monger because I hate things that are brown...I'm a lover of everything!) I actually do love Chocolate ice cream, Senator Obama I really do! And I love to eat all kinds of ice cream, especially with undocumented citizens waiting in the lobby of any local hospital; which I hope will soon be State run, so that they are more efficient
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
Their eye's, the twinkle in their step. The sheen in their hair, but most of all I can totally notice those that saved a ton of money on their car insurance..... Seriously-I notice what I like to call their Happy Meter. I'm a pretty good spotter outer of the scrooges and the angry "You Kids Get Off My Lawn" types. I'm drawn to the magnanamous, fun loving, this life is a blast!, kinda people. I think that's why I would be such a fan of me! (for those with short term memory loss please refer to question 6, or laugh weakly, acting like you got the punch line, and move on. At this point the joke is totally lost, and not worth repeating. Keep up people!)
15. RED OR PINK?
I'm part Female due to my proximity to a healthy dose of estrogen and estrogens in training. I also have a pink shirt, three pink ties (yes you guessed it, one from Emily, Aubrey, and Natalie) and I can spot out a simply fantastic pink ensemble that would look just lovely on Aubrey any day of the week. So I think I'm gonna have to go with Orange. I really love the dark orange color. Green is a close second.
16. What do you like the least about yourself
Well since I've been able to trade in my beer keg for a hearty Sam Adams Pale Ale six pack (thank you wii fit!) I would have to say I'm ready to play chess with Enoch and Co. I'm just teasin! I lost my Sam Adams six pack to a local native at the local indian casino. I tried to win back at least a six pack of Pabst Beer, but al I got was a darn keg of O'Doules. Yeah, you probably saw through my wry innuendoes....I'm fat, fat fat fattykins. Fatty McButter pants. I'm not to fond of my fat. So I either dislike my fat most, or my disappointment in not getting into Harvard Law. I totally slacked off my Senior year of Shop class, and I'm hating myself for it! Stupid Stupid Stupid!
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
It's a toss up. Either Bee Bop or Rock Steady. They both gave the Ninja turtles such a run for their money back in the 80's. I remember this one episode where Rock Steady got angry at Bee Bop for messing around and not taking his job of crushing Leonardo and Splinter seriously enough. They both ended up getting punished by shredder and his mighty army of ninjas, and Rock Steady was like, Man I don't deserve this, it was totally Bee Bops fault...he forgot the radioactive slime that they were supposed to dump down the sewer drain....Seriously though, I like Emily miss Her Grandmother. Thanksgiving isn't the same without the traditional trip to Redmond Orgeon in November to spend with Earline! It's hard to lose those close to you. I miss family who have now moved on to a better place.
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU?
Nawh, I totally like writing all of this stuff for my own amusement. I'm not what you would call a "people person". I prefer the life of a hermit with internet of course. I'm only doing this because the estrogen army commands it. And when they command, I obey. I am and will always be....thy humble servant.
19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
You kidding me! It's 1:45 AM! I have a strict no pants, no shoes policy after midnight! Sleepovers for the girls are a real nightmare!
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
A Rory Burger this afternoon. It's from the Corvette Diner; a 60's throwback diner, where the music is loud and the waiters and waitresses throw bubble gum and straws at you. My and a few other associates (who also didn't get into Harvard Law) like to hang out here. The Rory burger is in honor of Roy Orbison, who liked peanut butter on his burger. The flavor rocks, don't knock it till ya try it!
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
My favorite iTunes playlist that has Coldplay, Korn, Lynkin Park, Seether, U2, and Nicklback songs......Aaawwwee Yeeeeeaaaahhhh, Dog! (Aarons probably the only one chuckling at this point...) Right now though I'm on Viva La Vida, from Coldplay: Viva La Vida! Probably the very best song about redemption, self worth, perseverance, and hope that has ever been made.
22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
I would need to form a focus group on this one. I would need to be the color that children like the very least. I've been a Nursery leader for four years! I've seen what children to to Crayons, and it is not pretty or cute. There are some places that a Crayon is not meant to go.
23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
The Smell of Success. I also love "the smell of napalm in the morning". I hear it smells a lot like Nutmeg.
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Emily, at 10:30, chastising me for not having the children in bed yet. Natalie has an appointment at 8AM to mow down some unfortunate 4 yr. olds in a game called soccer. Why am I still up! The O'Doules is gettin to me.
25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
Like her? I love her! I even married her! Eternal Marriage ROCKS! Without her I'd be the awkward older single brother that nobody in the family quite knew how to relate to. And I doubt I would be receiving these great emails. Sorry Matt, you'll have to ask your wife what it's like to read and respond to these cool emails! :-)
26. FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH?
Womens Vollyball..... I've gotta be truthful here! Basketball and BYU Football are great too! Go BYU! Ranked #17 in the nation right now, and only movin up! But nothin beats a good Chargers game. Phillips, LT, Merriman, Castillo, Olshansky, Gates (injured, but still there for moral support) San Diego Chargers are Electrifying!
27. HAIR COLOUR? Tan, Red, Blue, White, Yellow (I'm wearing a baseball cap whenever feasible...even at work sometimes with a suit and tie. It's never a bad time to show your team spirit in San Diego!
28. EYE COLOR?
Brown
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
Yes- I'm Mr. Magoo without em!
30. FAVORITE FOOD?
Cold Cereal and Sandwiches. Joey and I are kindred spirits!
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Scary Movies that make you happy the bad guy gets it in the ending.
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
John Adams. Our Founding Fathers were AMAZING!
33. WHAT COLOUR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
I call them my Friday shirts. today it's a grey shirt with a toilet paper roll on it (that's how I roll!)
34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
I love the Winter. Heat sucks! That's why they define Hell as a never ending lake of fire and brimstone. Liberals also like Summer more because the polar ice caps melt faster in the summer. When it's winter and we have record ice growth, it's kind of a buzz kill to their whole global warming "save the panda bear by living in a tee pee" cash cow. I'm gonna go with winter.
35. HUGS OR KISSES?
I wasn't a fan of the Hershey Hugs, call me old fashioned, but I say don't mess with a good thing, nothing satisfies that inner urge like a good Kiss. Emily, get your mind out of the gutter! I'm a man, not a piece of meat! I have feelings!
36. FAVOURITE DESSERT?
I think I covered this one earlier...Sugar, Cream, Milk....
37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
Aaron, I totally agree, Matt will definitely respond! I'm still waiting for him to respond to an email I sent him in '97 asking if I could borrow his scanner for some documents that Harvard requested I send them, prior to my acceptance into their fine institution. That dream's a gonner! :-)
38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND
My daughter Addison. She's such a slacker! I've told her time and time again; if ya got time to just sit there and poop, ya got time to catch up on your email! I don't want her to turn into her uncle.....
39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
If Democrats had any brains they'd be Republicans, by Anne Coulter. An Inconvenient book, by Glenn Beck. I am America, and So Can You, by Stephen Colbert. Liberal Fascism, by Jonah Goldberg. And Entertainment Weekly while I'm taking my alone time in the bathroom.
40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSEPAD
This question is right up there with, "what brand of abacus do you use?" I got's me a laptop and it's got a mouse built right in.
41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT?
John Adams, and I almost cried as I was sucked into the story of the struggles that not only our founding fathers make, but all of the brave men and women who sacrificed their family life for the dream of independence and liberty. Again, Paul Giamatti is an amazing actor (aside for Lady in the Lake...ugh...), and I will always be in love with the history of our great nation!
42. FAVORITE SOUND?
Aubrey and Natalie laughing and giggling together as they run around the house and are consumed in joy and happiness at being kids. I know at that moment that I'm doing something right
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
I've never liked the Beatles. Blood starts to come out of my ears when their music is played! And the Rolling Stones don't have a great sound either. I know they played a HUGE role in ushering in Rock and Roll as we know it today, and they shaped the many great bands that sprang from them, but I don't know of anyone that say's "Yum! I LOVE Yeast! It tastes great!" But without yeast, we would have crappy bread, and I love bread; especially with meat on it!
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Hungary! Amazing trip!
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
You know, like nun-chuck skills, bow hunting skills, computer hacking skills. I'm training to be a cage fighter, and I'm pretty good with the bow staff.
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Sin City
47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?
Eddie Spaghetti with the Meatball eyes...I'd also like to hear from Bill. As a Facilities Manager I oversee the security of my buildings, and I'd like to hear from a fellow law enforcement officer, similar to two agencies working together for the common good (those of you not in law enforcement wouldn't understand....Bill I hope you know that if there is anything I can share with you that might help you maintain the peace in the great State of Texas, I'd be more than willing to share resources. But, I'm pretty busy, similar to Matt's hectic schedule, so you may need to get in contact with my department's Beuro Chief - Emily. She can work out the details...)
OK, it's now 12:30, I just got home from working tirelessly at keeping everyone at work happy and satisfied with their work environment. It's a tough job, but with my amazing talents I seem to get the job done somehow! Matt, I know you and I both work extremely hard (your the second hardest worker I know), but comonow....even I can find time to respond to email. Maybe if you had a job in some type of technology industry that required you to use computers....oh wait a minute....heh heh! Love ya brutha.....now on to the serious matter at hand:
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
Yes, I believe Eric, Aaron, Janene, and Kari were named first. I was named after them. I guess I was also named after Adam and Eve; I think my femininity (total word because spell check says so) comes from her. I get my humility from Ghandi I think (in case your wondering, I was also named after him).
Seriously: (apparently this is a theme): Grandpa Palmer, Freeman Moses Palmer- My good looks totally came from him! Have you seen pictures of his vivacious smile and stunning hair! My genes RULE!!
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
I cry all the time (I think I got that from Eve too; either her or Glenn Beck...he's a total cry baby as well, probably because he knows Barack Obama will be our next President....YES WE CAN!) Seriously: Probably after hearing the story of the 9 yr old Chinese boy that walked with Yao Ming in the Olympic Opening Ceremonies! I love to hear stories of courage and faith and goodwill, especially in a commi country like China. It gives me hope for the future of our country when we're stuck with Chairman Obama (YES WE CAN!!)
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Love it! My preference is Courier or San Serif. When I'm feeling really bold I like to use Bank Gothic. Seriously: "I love technology...." I like being able to read legibly, so please people; type more, write less! Most people don't want to admit it, but 9/10 peoples handwriting sucks rocks (this is a fact that I got straight from The Daily Show!). alnveoihapuhe asoiefahe aoinwvoi aoihhgpijrg9ojahwfouhwef..... See? Not being able to understand what someone wrote really stinks, so let's get typing people (everyone except Matt of course...we all know he doesn't know how to use a keyboard; which is why he has a wife. Way to go Kari! Matt, if you actually do read this, snicker snicker, chortle chortle, it's OK, we can't all be perfect, and I know it's probably because your still at work fixing computers. Maybe tomorrow you'll get around to learning to actually USE them :0 )
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE LUNCH MEAT?
I'm gonna go with the kind that comes from animals. Add a bit of honey or dry rub, and it's even better! To put it plainly... if it used to moo, oink, cluck, plead to stay on the farm just another day, I'm gonna love "gettin it in ma bellee"! And, for the record, that nasty stuff that Grandma Solie would "spread" in between bread, is NOT meat! That's like saying that just because Matt works on Computers, he knows how to respond to email or type! Total fallacy!
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
Three of the cutest little rays of sunshine on planet earth! Hey, I got no problem admitting it! My kids are cuter than your kids and I'll fight anyone who says otherwise (remember that I was also named after Genghis Khan and Hillary Clinton so I can have a bitter mean streak at times!) Seriously: Aubrey is Miss America, Natalie is that cute powder puff girl that is all girl, but has no problem kicking your ass if the case warrants it. And Addison is one big smiling, calm, peaceful, bowl of sunshine with happiness sprinkles with a dollop of adorable on top. Hold on a sec....I need a bowl of Ice Cream....
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Of course! I have a split personality. If I'm kind to me then I would totally hang out with myself. Or if I end up being a total nimrod (for some reason Mike Huckabee comes to mind..thanks Huck for siphoning off enough votes from Mitt Romney to make sure that we get saddles with John "Mavrick on the outside, gooey socialist who likes taxes and hugging trees on the inside" McCain) then I think I would just take the high road with myself, count my blessings that I'm not as bitter as the former me, and do my Latter Day Saint Duty by "fellowshipping" the horrible nimroddiness (I don't think that's a word because spell check put a bunch of red dots underneath it) out of myself. Wait....who's on Second Base
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?
Ya know....after thinking long and hard about it...I don't think so! What a silly question! For me, that's like saying, "is it really difficult for you to keep your washboard abs looking as great as your biceps?" Of course not! It all comes naturally and without forethought. (when will the sarcasm end?)
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
I don't know...Like Eric I have never seen them, and I truly believe it's a made up bodily appendage. It's totally the doctors excuse to explain away any and all problems you may have in your head. The same is true with the appendix and the fifth metatarsal (Randy is the spelling correct on that one?)
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
Only if the bungee cord was actually a 1" thick steel cable, and the "jump portion" was a HUGE crane that slowly lowered me down in a large metal box. Kinda like those large people movers that you see in large buildings that have more than one floor. I think they are called elevators. I LOVE Elevators, especially the ones with the glass walls that let you see all the action around you are you speed up and down the elongated shaft that keeps the elevator upright. What can I say...I'm a sucker for thrill rides!!!
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
I would have to say the kind that come in a box. I can eat the ones that come in a bag, but they don't have the same corn syrup/sugar mix that I have grown accustomed to... And cereal gives me a chance to catch up on all the adolescent years of being separated from my long lost soul mate...Milk. Oh sweet nectar of the bovine Teet! I shall never leave thee again! Cows rule! Milk in the mornin, roast beef in the afternoon, and steak in the evening (but only during times of winter or famine...of course).
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OF ?
No, I myself, like my good friend and bother in law Matt, I have my wife do the things I'm just too busy to do myself. Thanks Matt, you are a true Patriot of the Patriarchal order! And when my wife isn't around I like to teach my wonderful daughters what being a truly devoted daughter is all about, by having them take my shoes off after a hard day of bacon getting. So as to the initial question I'll have to consult with my wife and daughters to see if they untie my shoes before taking them off. I'm usually just too exhausted at the end of a long work day to notice how they release me from my pedestrian chains. Seriously, I will be beaten and flogged for making such a comment in public. Please refer to the definition of Natalie in question 5; my ass has just been handed to her for the kicking....
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?
This is such a derogatory and demeaning question. I would like to consider myself somewhat of a champion of the people. This would include people of all strengthnicities (again, there go those darn red dots under my letters! grrr); some that might engender similarities to myself like magnanimous brute power, as well as those who might not have the commanding presence that I tend to radiate. I would like to think that I can relate to all people of all sizes and strengths (I'm trying to gain the Vice Presidential nomination with Barack Obama, how am I doin?) Oh yeah....Change and Hope make us all Strong...
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
I yeah...I forgot about Ice Cream! MAN DO I LOVE COWS!!!! I would have to say my favorite kind is that one that.....ummm...oh the name escapes me....oh yeah, it's the one that has cream, suger, and milk in it....I like that one, but not chocolate. I like vanilla more than chocolate. Not that there is a problem with chocolate (just in case the Obama camp happens to get this email, I don't want them to label me as a hate monger because I hate things that are brown...I'm a lover of everything!) I actually do love Chocolate ice cream, Senator Obama I really do! And I love to eat all kinds of ice cream, especially with undocumented citizens waiting in the lobby of any local hospital; which I hope will soon be State run, so that they are more efficient
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
Their eye's, the twinkle in their step. The sheen in their hair, but most of all I can totally notice those that saved a ton of money on their car insurance..... Seriously-I notice what I like to call their Happy Meter. I'm a pretty good spotter outer of the scrooges and the angry "You Kids Get Off My Lawn" types. I'm drawn to the magnanamous, fun loving, this life is a blast!, kinda people. I think that's why I would be such a fan of me! (for those with short term memory loss please refer to question 6, or laugh weakly, acting like you got the punch line, and move on. At this point the joke is totally lost, and not worth repeating. Keep up people!)
15. RED OR PINK?
I'm part Female due to my proximity to a healthy dose of estrogen and estrogens in training. I also have a pink shirt, three pink ties (yes you guessed it, one from Emily, Aubrey, and Natalie) and I can spot out a simply fantastic pink ensemble that would look just lovely on Aubrey any day of the week. So I think I'm gonna have to go with Orange. I really love the dark orange color. Green is a close second.
16. What do you like the least about yourself
Well since I've been able to trade in my beer keg for a hearty Sam Adams Pale Ale six pack (thank you wii fit!) I would have to say I'm ready to play chess with Enoch and Co. I'm just teasin! I lost my Sam Adams six pack to a local native at the local indian casino. I tried to win back at least a six pack of Pabst Beer, but al I got was a darn keg of O'Doules. Yeah, you probably saw through my wry innuendoes....I'm fat, fat fat fattykins. Fatty McButter pants. I'm not to fond of my fat. So I either dislike my fat most, or my disappointment in not getting into Harvard Law. I totally slacked off my Senior year of Shop class, and I'm hating myself for it! Stupid Stupid Stupid!
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
It's a toss up. Either Bee Bop or Rock Steady. They both gave the Ninja turtles such a run for their money back in the 80's. I remember this one episode where Rock Steady got angry at Bee Bop for messing around and not taking his job of crushing Leonardo and Splinter seriously enough. They both ended up getting punished by shredder and his mighty army of ninjas, and Rock Steady was like, Man I don't deserve this, it was totally Bee Bops fault...he forgot the radioactive slime that they were supposed to dump down the sewer drain....Seriously though, I like Emily miss Her Grandmother. Thanksgiving isn't the same without the traditional trip to Redmond Orgeon in November to spend with Earline! It's hard to lose those close to you. I miss family who have now moved on to a better place.
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU?
Nawh, I totally like writing all of this stuff for my own amusement. I'm not what you would call a "people person". I prefer the life of a hermit with internet of course. I'm only doing this because the estrogen army commands it. And when they command, I obey. I am and will always be....thy humble servant.
19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
You kidding me! It's 1:45 AM! I have a strict no pants, no shoes policy after midnight! Sleepovers for the girls are a real nightmare!
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
A Rory Burger this afternoon. It's from the Corvette Diner; a 60's throwback diner, where the music is loud and the waiters and waitresses throw bubble gum and straws at you. My and a few other associates (who also didn't get into Harvard Law) like to hang out here. The Rory burger is in honor of Roy Orbison, who liked peanut butter on his burger. The flavor rocks, don't knock it till ya try it!
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
My favorite iTunes playlist that has Coldplay, Korn, Lynkin Park, Seether, U2, and Nicklback songs......Aaawwwee Yeeeeeaaaahhhh, Dog! (Aarons probably the only one chuckling at this point...) Right now though I'm on Viva La Vida, from Coldplay: Viva La Vida! Probably the very best song about redemption, self worth, perseverance, and hope that has ever been made.
22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
I would need to form a focus group on this one. I would need to be the color that children like the very least. I've been a Nursery leader for four years! I've seen what children to to Crayons, and it is not pretty or cute. There are some places that a Crayon is not meant to go.
23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
The Smell of Success. I also love "the smell of napalm in the morning". I hear it smells a lot like Nutmeg.
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Emily, at 10:30, chastising me for not having the children in bed yet. Natalie has an appointment at 8AM to mow down some unfortunate 4 yr. olds in a game called soccer. Why am I still up! The O'Doules is gettin to me.
25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
Like her? I love her! I even married her! Eternal Marriage ROCKS! Without her I'd be the awkward older single brother that nobody in the family quite knew how to relate to. And I doubt I would be receiving these great emails. Sorry Matt, you'll have to ask your wife what it's like to read and respond to these cool emails! :-)
26. FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH?
Womens Vollyball..... I've gotta be truthful here! Basketball and BYU Football are great too! Go BYU! Ranked #17 in the nation right now, and only movin up! But nothin beats a good Chargers game. Phillips, LT, Merriman, Castillo, Olshansky, Gates (injured, but still there for moral support) San Diego Chargers are Electrifying!
27. HAIR COLOUR? Tan, Red, Blue, White, Yellow (I'm wearing a baseball cap whenever feasible...even at work sometimes with a suit and tie. It's never a bad time to show your team spirit in San Diego!
28. EYE COLOR?
Brown
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
Yes- I'm Mr. Magoo without em!
30. FAVORITE FOOD?
Cold Cereal and Sandwiches. Joey and I are kindred spirits!
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Scary Movies that make you happy the bad guy gets it in the ending.
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
John Adams. Our Founding Fathers were AMAZING!
33. WHAT COLOUR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
I call them my Friday shirts. today it's a grey shirt with a toilet paper roll on it (that's how I roll!)
34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
I love the Winter. Heat sucks! That's why they define Hell as a never ending lake of fire and brimstone. Liberals also like Summer more because the polar ice caps melt faster in the summer. When it's winter and we have record ice growth, it's kind of a buzz kill to their whole global warming "save the panda bear by living in a tee pee" cash cow. I'm gonna go with winter.
35. HUGS OR KISSES?
I wasn't a fan of the Hershey Hugs, call me old fashioned, but I say don't mess with a good thing, nothing satisfies that inner urge like a good Kiss. Emily, get your mind out of the gutter! I'm a man, not a piece of meat! I have feelings!
36. FAVOURITE DESSERT?
I think I covered this one earlier...Sugar, Cream, Milk....
37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
Aaron, I totally agree, Matt will definitely respond! I'm still waiting for him to respond to an email I sent him in '97 asking if I could borrow his scanner for some documents that Harvard requested I send them, prior to my acceptance into their fine institution. That dream's a gonner! :-)
38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND
My daughter Addison. She's such a slacker! I've told her time and time again; if ya got time to just sit there and poop, ya got time to catch up on your email! I don't want her to turn into her uncle.....
39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
If Democrats had any brains they'd be Republicans, by Anne Coulter. An Inconvenient book, by Glenn Beck. I am America, and So Can You, by Stephen Colbert. Liberal Fascism, by Jonah Goldberg. And Entertainment Weekly while I'm taking my alone time in the bathroom.
40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSEPAD
This question is right up there with, "what brand of abacus do you use?" I got's me a laptop and it's got a mouse built right in.
41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT?
John Adams, and I almost cried as I was sucked into the story of the struggles that not only our founding fathers make, but all of the brave men and women who sacrificed their family life for the dream of independence and liberty. Again, Paul Giamatti is an amazing actor (aside for Lady in the Lake...ugh...), and I will always be in love with the history of our great nation!
42. FAVORITE SOUND?
Aubrey and Natalie laughing and giggling together as they run around the house and are consumed in joy and happiness at being kids. I know at that moment that I'm doing something right
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
I've never liked the Beatles. Blood starts to come out of my ears when their music is played! And the Rolling Stones don't have a great sound either. I know they played a HUGE role in ushering in Rock and Roll as we know it today, and they shaped the many great bands that sprang from them, but I don't know of anyone that say's "Yum! I LOVE Yeast! It tastes great!" But without yeast, we would have crappy bread, and I love bread; especially with meat on it!
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Hungary! Amazing trip!
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
You know, like nun-chuck skills, bow hunting skills, computer hacking skills. I'm training to be a cage fighter, and I'm pretty good with the bow staff.
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Sin City
47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?
Eddie Spaghetti with the Meatball eyes...I'd also like to hear from Bill. As a Facilities Manager I oversee the security of my buildings, and I'd like to hear from a fellow law enforcement officer, similar to two agencies working together for the common good (those of you not in law enforcement wouldn't understand....Bill I hope you know that if there is anything I can share with you that might help you maintain the peace in the great State of Texas, I'd be more than willing to share resources. But, I'm pretty busy, similar to Matt's hectic schedule, so you may need to get in contact with my department's Beuro Chief - Emily. She can work out the details...)
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Ups and Downs
So as a Mom you get your moments of confidence. That feeling of, I know what I'm doing, I am handling this Mommy thing pretty well, I can take what this job dishes out. And most importantly I can give my kids the care they need. And then karma bites you in the ass. So here was my high. Poor Addison got a nasty bout of diahrea this week. And as an experienced mom I knew the best medicine was lots of diaper changes, some A&D and lots of air exposing free time. Addie took it upon herself to help with that one. Yes she is holding her feet. Ah to be so flexible. And she spent about 4 hours in this position. As you can see she's laying on one of her many blankies (I knew there was a reason I bought 800 yards of flannel for blankets.) About every hour we'd change her blankie so that she was able to go all night without a diaper and by morning the rash was gone. Hooray. I was even able to find the humor in the whole thing and take a silly picture.
And now for karma. Natalie (why is it always her) went to the dentist this week. Now for some r
eason I've always had it in my head that good mothers don't let their kids get cavities. I don't know why but I've always thought that. Just like men are suppose to do yard work and take out the trash, it just IS. So we go to the dentist and I am informed that I am a horrible mother because not only does my 4-year old have SEVEN cavities but she will need a root canal and crown! That teeny-tiny black spot is the proof of my failure. I actually started crying at the dentist's office. So in two weeks we are headed back for the first of two visits to repair the damage my neglect has done.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
I cannot train you as I trained the five...
Ok so I love Kung Fu Panda. Right after Batman my favorite movie this year. And I find ways to quote it regularly. So anyway my middle child has proven to test me at every phase, prompting me to change how I parent. And not to exaggerate but I have read a LOT of parenting books (I'm a reader, when I have a problem I look for a book). And none of them were able to help me with the challenges I was dealing with. Until I found this book. WOW! It was the first time I read a book that didn't immediately say "ADD, need medication, special diet, etc." Because truthfully the ADD diagnosis didn't fit her, as she can focus for hours on a project. I haven't finished the book yet but already I've been able to make adjustments in our family that better address her needs (and mine!) and we are already beginning to see changes in her. So thank you Linda Budd for helping me understand my amazing little girl!
Monday, August 4, 2008
One HILARIOUS read!
Ok, so I haven't posted in ages. But summer break ends tomorrow (I don't know whether to cry or dance with joy). But you have to read this guy's blog. I was on the floor rolling with laughter!
http://www.bishophiggins.blogspot.com/
http://www.bishophiggins.blogspot.com/
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